Since I try to write about my dialy life, this is an item that can not be missed. I hear people talking about ramadan and the warmth it brings to everyone, the solidarity. Fasting together, eating together when sun goes down, praying together, remembering and thanking Allah swt for all the blessings given to us. I hear about it, but I never felt all of it. Ramadan is different for me. My family is Christian and this society is also mostly based on that. This is a day of my ramadan.
I stayed awake till fadj so I stood up late at 11:00. It’s still a long day, cause sun goes down at 21:33 here. I have to hurry up cause I need to go to the shop before I go to a businessmeeting in the afternoon. For most people it’s kinda weird, but shops close here at 18:00. After that it’s quiet in the streets and after 22:00 most people go to bed. What a difference is that to what I’ve seen in many Islamic countries. But, to keep it short, I go to the supermarket and leave for the meeting.
At the meeting they offer me coffee/tea/water and as I say politely no and explain it’s ramadan, I get the same old questions. Every year in ramadan I get the same questions and mostly even from the same people. “Oh, it’s ramadan…..but you can still drink some water right?”. I explain again and then the final comment is most likely “Yeah, but you can do it secretly right, I won’t tell anyone”. You know, I always explain, but some people just don’t want to know or learn.
After the meeting I go home and while I’m driving, I’m being stopped by the police. Routine alcohol check. For real! The policeman asked (before I have to blow into a machine) if I've been drinking today. I smile and try to be funny “Not even a single drop of water, sir”. He looks at me and asks “Are you drunk?”. I laugh so hard it takes me 5 minutes to calm down and explain it’s ramadan. I must note, most policemen know this, but apparently this policeman was sick the day this lesson was given at the academy. Ofcourse I still have to blow in some kind of machine, cause, and I quote “otherwise everyone can say he/she is having ramadan while they are secretly drinking”.
When I get home I call my parents, see how they are doing. My mom asks me to come by next week for dinner. I explain that I can come by, but that it’s ramadan and I can not eat with them. This is a struggle ever year. They know I fast, but they feel that I can still eat with them. What is the difference if I eat 1 day with them? I explain every year, but sometimes it feels like talking to the Chinese wall. My mom tells me to stay home if I don’t want to come by to eat. Ok. I don’t know how to respond to it anymore. I go sit on my couch and start reading Quran.
At 20:30 I start to plan my cooking. Props for all the women who don’t need to plan this and who’s kitchen is not totally ruined. Everything has to be finished at the same time, so it’s all warm and fresh. That really needs some scheduling, otherwise I would forget at least 1 thing. It kinda feels like going on vacation. I pack the day before but can’t sleep at night, cause I still have this feeling somewhere inside me that I forget something. Turns out I indeed always forget something. Luckily I only have to feed myself, otherwise it would be a disaster in my kitchen.
And then, it’s finally time. I eat a date, do my praying and go to eat a healthy iftar. I’m easily filled and now I’m here, drinking my coffee and writing this. I love ramadan, the meanings behind it, the feeling I get, the awareness it brings. It’s the best month of the year. But I do miss the gathering, the sharing, the solidarity. I wish you all a blessed ramadan with all your family and friends. Enjoy and ,most importantly, learn.
